College Relationships

The Desperation for Relationships Among College Students: A Cultural Reflection 

Photo by Eliott Reyna on Unsplash

In recent years, the topic of relationships has gained immense prominence, especially among college students. It’s hard to overlook the increasing emphasis on having a girlfriend, which seems almost like a rite of passage for many young men in college. But what’s driving this trend? Is it just hormones, or is there more to it—something influenced by pop culture, social media, and even movies?

Movies and TV shows often set the stage for how relationships are perceived by young people. Take, for example, popular movies like Sita Ramam or Kushi, where love is shown as a magical, transformative experience. Characters fall in love in dramatic, romanticized ways, often underlining the belief that finding “the one” is essential for a fulfilling life. This on-screen narrative permeates the minds of young people, who start to believe that they too need a girlfriend to feel complete.

Furthermore, with platforms like Netflix and Disney+ promoting love-centric content, it's hard for students not to be influenced by the romantic idealism portrayed in these shows. Movies like Dear Comrade have shown how college life is often intertwined with love stories, further solidifying the idea that college is a time for finding romance

In today’s world, Instagram, Snapchat, and Facebook hold immense power in shaping how college students view relationships. Many students constantly see friends and influencers flaunting their relationships online, which creates a sense of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). This results in a competitive mindset, where students feel pressured to have a girlfriend not because of genuine affection, but because it boosts their social image. Relationships are often used as a metric of "coolness" or success, with some students believing that having a partner will gain them status or validation from their peers.

College students often feel pressured by societal norms that equate being in a relationship with maturity. In many cultures, being single past a certain age can be stigmatized. Families, friends, and even society at large often push young people into relationships, framing it as a part of “growing up.” This is often reinforced by discussions in dorm rooms, group chats, and on campuses where students who are single may feel left out or "less experienced."

Aside from the cultural influences, there’s also a psychological aspect to this desperation. College can be a time of immense stress, especially with academic pressure, career planning, and the challenges of personal identity. Having a girlfriend can provide a sense of companionship, emotional support, and even a distraction from the anxieties of college life. Relationships give students someone to lean on during tough times, and that sense of connection is a strong motivator in seeking romantic relationships.

In recent years, news outlets have also highlighted the mental health issues related to loneliness among students. Reports show that many young people feel isolated, especially with the rise of digital communication, which ironically leaves students feeling more disconnected than ever. During the COVID-19 pandemic, for instance, the isolation forced upon students further intensified the desire for close companionship, with many feeling the void of in-person social interactions.

A notable example is the increasing trend of dating apps like Tinder and Bumble gaining massive traction among college students, reflecting this desperation for quick relationships. Apps like these have been criticized for promoting superficial relationships, yet they remain popular, illustrating the underlying emotional needs that college students are eager to fulfill.

Consider films like Arjun Reddy, which depict passionate, all-consuming relationships. Despite their controversies, these movies have resonated deeply with young audiences, portraying love as an intense, almost necessary experience. Many college students, particularly male students, idolize these on-screen depictions of love and start to seek similar relationships, often feeling incomplete without one.

In Geetha Govindam, for instance, the hero's desperation to win over a girl turns into a comical but relatable narrative, showing how much effort young people are willing to invest in relationships. These movies create fantasies that young people start to chase in real life, not realizing that reality doesn't often mirror the movies.

While there’s nothing inherently wrong with wanting a relationship, the growing desperation among college students to have a girlfriend stems from various influences: societal pressures, peer expectations, media portrayals, and emotional needs. Understanding these influences is crucial to ensure that students don’t rush into relationships for the wrong reasons, but instead, focus on building meaningful and genuine connections.

In today’s world, it’s important for young people to realize that being single is equally valid, and relationships, when approached for the right reasons, can truly be enriching experiences—not something born out of societal desperation.